Religion in Public Schools

I am sharing this with any reader out there in hopes of encouraging you today.

This week, my son went to his public school and handed out tracts to his friends and a flyer to a church event this week.  I was so proud of him and his excitement was enthusiastic.  Then on the a school happenings facebook page a angry parent posted something about it.  I watched and waited to see what would happen.  Wondered if I would get a call from the school telling me he couldn't pass out his precious tracts.  So far there has been no call.

But it did get me to looking at what was appropriate for children to do and say.  After a little research, I found this article which I find dependable.

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/1999/08/02/associations-right-in-schools

what I found was this and I quote it direct from the web-site with the website notated above:
" 3. May a student give out Gospel tracts or religious literature to his classmates?
Yes! Students may distribute religious tracts or literature to their schoolmates in the same manner as they would be permitted to distribute non-religious material. Schools may impose reasonable restrictions on the place and manner for distribution of all printed material, but religious literature may not be singled out for special restrictions or regulations. If the Boy Scouts or community sports team may distribute material promoting out-of-school programs, distribution of similar religious material must also be permitted. First Amendment rights include the right to distribute Gospel tracts or other religious literature during non-instructional times. The standard that must be applied is: Does the activity materially or substantially disrupt school discipline?
The school must prove that such disruption actually occurs. "[U]ndifferentiated fear or apprehension of disturbance is not enough to overcome the right to freedom of expression." Tinker at 508. When a student peacefully distributes tracts or other religious literature on school grounds during non-instructional time there is nothing that "might reasonably [lead] school authorities to forecast substantial disruption of or material interference with school activities." Tinker at 514"

So there you have it.  The public school can not make you stop doing it.  They can try and tell you to, but as long as your child is doing this during non-instructional time AND it is not causing a disruption that will harm someone else, they can not tell you what to do.

I find it amazing that people find God's word offensive.

Last night I thought about one thing. Why do people get angry when they are told about Jesus or the Bible is mentioned to them? We all teach our children the fundamental moral values of what is right and wrong: don’t steal, don’t cheat, don’t lie etc. But do some really realize those values come from the Bible itself? So why do people get upset about the Bible when the Bible is God’s guide boo...k to have a successful life and more?

The answer? People want to pick and choose what values they have. It's only natural. They don’t want to be accountable to someone else for the way they live. The only offensive thing the Bible does is show us our sin and people don’t like that revealed. Including myself at times. If you would like to read the tract in question, here it is.  You will have to click on each picture to bring it up and zoom on it to read it, but there is nothing in it that is offensive unless you don't love my Jesus.

3 Steps to Successful Parenting

Today is a special day for our family.  It is our first son's birthday and I remind myself at how far he has come since that day we met him in that cold Russian orphanage.  I wondered if his birth mom remembers him and what day today is.  I also wonder if she ever thinks about him.  I hope so.  I would love for her to see how he has grown and changed since she gave him a chance at a new life.

Our first son was challenging.  We walked straight into a little boys life where he was running at full speed.  He desperately needed love and discipline, but more importantly he needed our love.  We love our son so much, but we lacked the know how at times to effectively discipline him.  Over the years we read books, listened to messages, tried different techniques to see what would work the best for him.  Yes, even 4 years later we still struggled at times to pierce that heart of his to win his obedience.   We are definitely the type of people that has to have it spelled out to us how to handle a child.  Believe me, we have talked with other mentors and they had good counsel, but it wasn't until the other night that it hit us over the head what WE needed to do.

Earlier this year I had a friend from church give me some CDs of a pastor's message on "3 Steps to Successful Parenting." Believe me, I needed something simple but to the point to direct me.  You can get a little lost listening to multiple people tell you what you should do.  I started listening to the CD one afternoon and then stopped it because I knew I needed to sit down with my husband and really listen to what this man had to say.  So the next night my husband and I sat at the dinning table and took our own notes and discussed what we should do or change so that we were both on the same page.

My goal is not to go into deep detail about the message I heard.  My goal with this post is to share what stood out to me and share some of the insight I gained from God's word.  The message is simple.  It's something that everyone can do, even me.  Sometimes we look for things that lead us around in circles, but if you struggle with disciple, maybe something here will help you.

Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

God's word is simple.  When you look at the first part of Proverbs 22:6 it tells you to train UP a child.  It simply means start training your child at a early age.  It is so much easier.  Our oldest son was 18 months old when we brought him home.  We really thought that it would be no problem to train him.  We were dead wrong!  Even at 18 months of age, children have learned behaviors that will always be a part of them.  That is why I feel that this verse means to start from the time they are a tiny baby.  It is much easier to train their life from sleeping habits to eating habits and their attitudes when they are months old.

Ephesians 6:4, "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."

Do you believe that rebellion is a normal part of a child's life?  Think again.  Rebellion in children is caused by anger or inconsistency in 1 or both parents.  That is why Ephesians 6:4 says for father's {or mother} not to provoke a child because that will lead to outward and inward defiance.

So what are the 3 basic steps to successful parenting:

A)  Always win- be firm and ask yourself with each confrontation with your child "who won?}
B)  Be Gentle- we must cleanse our life from all harness and anger.
C)  Consistency-  Do you find yourself rushing through discipline because of what you are missing out on somewhere else?  Then STOP!  Don't rush through discipline or skip it because you are too busy with something else.  If you don't win the first battle, it does take longer to win the next one.

A)  Remember Proverbs 22:6?  Training is done by the parent and they must be perceived by the child to be the winner.  Colossions 3:20, "Children, obey [your] parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord."  Do you realize that this is the only place in the Bible that says that God is pleased when children obey their parents?  We must insist our children obey each time.  How will they obey God if they have not first learned to obey us as parents.  Make this phrase a part of your life and quote it to your child, "Do what I say, right away with a smile on your face."  {My husband and I were amazed at how effective this phrase is with our son when we quote it to him.  The response we have gotten from him has been night and day.}

The sermon went on to talk about how important it is to make eye contact with your child.  Get down on their level and make sure they are hearing you.  It's always been a struggle with my husband and I to get our son to make eye contact with us and hold it.  Most children who have been nurtured carefully from a baby will be able to achieve that but we did not.   We failed.  So we started practicing with our son and played it like it was a game as to who could make eye contact the longest.  I would smile at him, make faces and noises so that it was fun.  The most important part of this is that I have to remember to practice this while I am not disciplining him.   Psalm 32:8 says, "I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye."  I know I have read this verse before but it hit me hard when I heard it talked about in the context that the eyes will communicate with you.  When you lock your eyes and smile, it is a type of wordless communication that reaches deep into the soul.  The light of the body is the eyes.  So if someone will not look you in the eyes and maintain eye contact, you need to wonder what is going on inside of them.

So what about training a younger child, say a 1 year old?  Yes I have one of those too!  It was recommended to gently say no, frown, shake your head and GENTLY swat at their hand.  In the example they gave us, {baby getting out pots from cabinet and mother saying no.}, it took her one hour to train him.  After this hour, the baby crawled away and never bothered the cabinet again.  They made a good point.  Do you stop everything for just 1 hour to train, or would you rather spend countless days and years trying to training the the next time and the next time and the next time they disobey you.

So what type of tool should be used according to God's word?  Proverbs 22:15, "Foolishness [is] bound in the heart of a child; [but] the rod of correction shall drive it far from him."  The rod was explained in this verse as a small rod.  It is not a board or paddle.  Neither is it used in anger but out of love.

So what about the popular views on time-out?  Time out was discussed on the Cd as being harsher then a spanking.  When I first heard this, I wasn't for sure about that, but the verse they used made a lot of sense.  Remember Cain?  Yes, the man who killed his brother.  Genesis 4:12-13 says, "When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.  And Cain said unto the Lord, My punishment is greater than I can bear."  Do you see here that Cain was sent away to be separated from the ones he knew.  He said it was greater then he could bear.  This pastor mentioned that if you do use a time out that it should be used for big offenses.  Have them sit on the floor with a clock in front of them for 30 minutes.  If he continues to do the same offense, double it.  See what the child would prefer next... a rod or hours of sitting still watching a clock?

Have you ever been faced with a public battle?  Boy we have.  Yes it is embarrassing.  But did you know that the reason why you loose a public battle is because you are loosing them in private? 

Don't allow excuses for their behavior. 

Ask your children:
1) What did you do?
2) Did you know it was wrong?
These two questions will not give your child another way out.  He will have to answer for his behavior.  The main goal for always winning in battles is to get and keep your children's hearts.

B)  Be gentle and firm.
Think about how gentle Jesus was.  He never sinned even when he had to be firm.
Did you know that the gentleness in a child is learned from the gentleness in the parent, especially the father?
If we can't win over our own anger, then think about retiring to pray before we hand out the punishment.  Your child will notice that you are calling upon God and eventually as they get older they will fear your time with God more then they will the punishment knowing God is on your side.

So we all know what anger is.  It's not pretty.  Did you know the opposite of anger is the spirit of adoption?  Wow!  The thoughts that flooded through me when I heard that.  I remember how excited I was when we went through the process of adopting our two boys.  It is a high like no other.  If you have adopted, you will know what I mean.  They say that this feeling should be what you feel as you parent your children.  Loving, enjoying the children who are so delicate.  It is a happy and joyful spirit.  SLAM!  It felt like a truck hit me as I remembered myself being overwhelmed with parenting a 18 month old who would not submit to our authority.  We fell into getting upset and angry with him when nothing else would work.  It's hard work not getting upset with your children when they disobey, but I have learned.... I am the parent.

C)  Ephesians 6:4, "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."  Notice the word bring them up?  It means you must keep doing it.  It doesn't mean do it for a little while and stop.  It is a consistent action.  Moms and Dads must stand together and not be divided so that they can not undermine one or both authorities.  Be consistent in everything from how they dress, music, friends, church attendance and so on.  It even mentioned public school and what the kids learn there.  They will hear things that are contrary to what you teach them.  So it is necessary to make sure they hear the truth and understand it from the parent.

I know this is a lot of information hear.  The CD I listened too was very good.  My husband and I sat down and discussed the notes we each took and formed a list on where we needed to work on, what we were going to both do to be on the same page.  We even discussed that if we ever were harsh again with our children we would have to write a letter apologizing to our son and read it that night in front of the other family members to keep ourselves accountable to each other.

I know many have different feelings on disciple.  We have as a family taken steps to outline what it is we are going to do and stick to it.   I believe a print out of our "homework" list will make its way taped to a door as a reminder....

Casting Lots

I was listening to a radio station last night when I heard a discussion come about whether gambling was a sin or not.  The host then started discussing how the disciples cast lots and said that there was no difference.  It boiled down to whether or not how the "christian" was able to handle gambling if it was a sin or not.

I wish I could have spoken to that person on the radio.  He is leading a lot of baby Christians astray.  It made me want to tell him that they need to know their Bible a little better before answering such a thing.  Didn't they know what casting lots was?  Did I know?  What IS the difference between gambling and casting lots?

Good, I'm glad you are curious too!

So I begin my journey in finding out the basic differences are in gambling vs casting lots.

Let's first define the words:

Casting Lots:  pebbles, straws, dice etc that were used in decision making.  They used this method to chance to make a fair decision so that no one could say there was favoritism involved.  Think of it this way, we toss a coin and say, "heads or tails" to determine who wins.  It is done this way to show impartiality.  Nothing is given up to to win a physical possession.

Gambling:  is the wagering of money or something of monetary value for a chance to win something in turn.  Do you see the difference here?  To gamble you have to give up something to have a chance to maybe win something in return.  To me gambling and casting lots are not the same. 

So as the question was asked on this radio show.... is gambling a sin?  While the word Gamble or gambling is not in the Bible, I do believe it tells us it is wrong.

So how do you start looking?  Since it deals with money, let's see what God says about money.

Ecclesiates 5:10, "He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver; nor he that loveth abundance with increase: this [is] also vanity." 

God's word said we will not be satisfied with the increase.  We will always want more.

Matthew 6:24 and Luke 16:13, "No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon." 

If making more money is what drives you, it says here you can't serve God and money.

I Timothy 6:10, "For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows." 

Gambling affects many homes.  Hard earned cash is used in hopes of getting more and sometimes lives are devastated because of that.  Can you honestly tell me that when you go gambling that you don't have a tiny bit of excitement within you that you "hope" to win more money?   It's only natural that you would think you would be the lucky one to win!  Once you win, there is a drive within you that wants you to win more.  This is greed.

God talks about coveting too.  So what is coveting?  Coveting is a longing or a desire for something.  So when a person gambles, isn't he desiring more money?  While Exodus 20:17 says "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that [is] thy neighbour's.", it is essentially telling us that we should not desire to have something that is not ours. 

So how should we handle our money?

Read Matthew 25:14-30,

"For [the kingdom of heaven is] as a man travelling into a far country, [who] called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods. And unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one; to every man according to his several ability; and straightway took his journey. Then he that had received the five talents went and traded with the same, and made [them] other five talents. And likewise he that [had received] two, he also gained other two. But he that had received one went and digged in the earth, and hid his lord's money. After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them. And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents, saying, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me five talents: behold, I have gained beside them five talents more. His lord said unto him, Well done, [thou] good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord. He also that had received two talents came and said, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me two talents: behold, I have gained two other talents beside them. His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord. Then he which had received the one talent came and said, Lord, I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strawed: And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, [there] thou hast [that is] thine. His lord answered and said unto him, [Thou] wicked and slothful servant, thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not, and gather where I have not strawed: Thou oughtest therefore to have put my money to the exchangers, and [then] at my coming I should have received mine own with usury. Take therefore the talent from him, and give [it] unto him which hath ten talents. For unto every one that hath shall be given, and he shall have abundance: but from him that hath not shall be taken away even that which he hath. And cast ye the unprofitable servant into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."

As one can see, the Lord gives us our "money/talents".  He expects us to increase it for his glory or his purpose, not for our own gain.  One day he will ask us how we used it and will you say, you gambled it all away instead of furthering his kingdom? 

Prayers Unanswered

I've been working on trying to read through the Bible.  Yes it has been a slow process because I do not have a set way of doing it and when.  I'm doing in such an unconventional way that allows me to read where I left off when I have the time.  I finished the New Testament finally and now I am in the Old Testament.  Except I am starting with the last book first and trying to work my way backwards book by book. 

Today I am reading in Zechariah 7 and I had to stop.  Verses 8-14 hit me hard.  We often wonder why our spiritual life can be in shambles and wonder why our country is in the state it is in.  Read the follow verses, God has the answer and it clearly shows me why our prayers go unanswered and why are lives are not glorifying God.

Zechariah 7:8-13 (KJV), "And the word of the LORD came unto Zechariah, saying, Thus speaketh the LORD of hosts, saying, Execute true judgment, and shew mercy and compassions every man to his brother: And oppress not the widow, nor the fatherless, the stranger, nor the poor; and let none of you imagine evil against his brother in your heart. But they refused to hearken, and pulled away the shoulder, and stopped their ears, that they should not hear.  Yea, they made their hearts [as] an adamant stone, lest they should hear the law, and the words which the LORD of hosts hath sent in his spirit by the former prophets: therefore came a great wrath from the LORD of hosts. Therefore it is come to pass, [that] as he cried, and they would not hear; so they cried, and I would not hear, saith the LORD of hosts: But I scattered them with a whirlwind among all the nations whom they knew not. Thus the land was desolate after them, that no man passed through nor returned: for they laid the pleasant land desolate."

Do you see this happening in our country?  Is it happening in my life?  Forgive me Lord not keeping my thoughts totally pure for not listening at times and refusing to follow your commands.  I have at times done all this.  Keep my heart tender so that I won't forget to serve others, to listen, and to stay close to you. 

The God's word says that if we follow this pattern of oppression or thinking evil of others he will scatter us and we will be desolate.  God will not hear us when we call out to him.  Can we afford that?

Pricking the Skin

The other day I was making several baked potatoes in the microwave when my oldest son asked me why I had to poke the potato before baking it.  At the time I thought nothing of it, I just responded, "so it wouldn't explode."  This morning as I was preparing a sweet potato to put in the oven, I started poking the potato and thought about what my son had asked me.  Since a recent blog post on anger had been on my mind, I thought about how we too are like a potato.  A potato has moisture in it and when heated it creates steam.  If no holes have been poked in it, there is no way for it to escape and it will explode.

How many times have you seen someone explode in anger?  They let something build up inside and then when heat is applied, they explode to release the inner turmoil they are feeling.  What is left is a mess.  Sometimes it can be clean up, but most likely it will leave damage behind that can be unrepairable.

Proverbs 14:29, "[He that is] slow to wrath [is] of great understanding: but [he that is] hasty of spirit exalteth folly."

My youngest son now is beginning to show us when he gets upset.  He gets told "no" and he puts on his pouty face and scrunches up his eyes, tilts his head back and walks away crying.  He usually walks all over the place or finally plops down on his diapered bottom wallowing in his self pity.  There are times I want to laugh, but I don't want to encourage him that that is the right way to handle it.

It's hard to admit, but don't we too as adults do that at times?  We walk around upset at something and finally with a huff we sit on our duff, crying, waiting for someone to come along and give us pity and nurse our resentment.  If we don't watch it we can stew on it too long and then one day it explodes out of us like that baked potato I was talking about. 

We must move on and learn to get over it quickly like Ephesians 4:26 says, "Be ye angry and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath."  Don't let little things: resentment and bitterness go on.  Deal with it the day it pops up.  If you just nip at the weed that has started to grow, the root will still be there getting bigger.  Then one day when the right conditions are there it will show itself and be bigger then before and harder to pull out.

I know I am switching gears a little but I want to know what is the biblical way to deal with anger in children?  1) Do you let them have there tantrum and sit and watch it.  Wait until the have finished and then step in to correct.  2) Or do you interrupt it trying to calm them down?  I know when I interrupt one of my child's tantrums it only gets worse and he can't hear a word I say.  It does me no good to discipline when he is in the middle of his tantrum. 

Something to think about.

Rambling

One of my favorite things I like to do is watch a little bit of 48 Hours or Dateline.  Of course, I am careful what I watch, but one thing that sticks out to me is the process that leads people into sin.  I began to notice that it was just one sin in those peoples life that lead to other sins, which lead to more sin.

Remember what the Bible says about when you break one of the 10 Commandments or Law, you have broken them all?  I can clearly see that in some of the stories that were laid out.  One sin of covetousness, lead to hate or an affair and lying and then ultimately to murder.  Interesting...  You just can't commit one sin, because they are usually linked to another one.....

A few weeks ago I noticed that a lot of the news shows where broadcasting stories of affairs or murders dealing with people that attended Baptist churches.  It made me sad to see how much news there was out there, which tarnishes the name of the church.  People then began to view you has an hypocrite if you tell them what church affiliation you are from.  Sad....  But this one particular story was really sad.  It all started with the associate Pastor's family and another family who were close friends.  The wife of the friend was head of the young peoples drama dance team. {yes this church was Baptist church I think.  Sad.}  She started working closely with the associate Pastor and over time they started having an affair which then lead to her husband's murder.

This story reminded me of a radio broadcast I heard about the rise in affairs in churches and some of the warning signs of them.  I don't remember who it was that spoke, but what I heard was good.  Women need to be cautious about working with other men in the church.  What may start out as work can lead into something neither person was looking for.   One may have hit a rough patch in their marriage and pretty soon the other person is building their ego and getting their respect.  Pretty soon it becomes flirtatious.  Then pretty soon they spend more time together and then it because more intimate.

We see it all around us.  We get lulled into a comfort zone of thinking we are immune, but we are not.  We have to be constantly on guard because Satan would like nothing more then to ruin our families lives.  Just look at the families on these shows that go through this.  Their lives are torn apart.  Their kids have not just one parent taken away but possible both, depending on the circumstances.

It makes me glad that our church does not allow women to teach the young men or men in the church.  One the Bible says so, I Tim 2:12, "But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. ", but it prevents men from have their emotions played with.  Our young men are all ready bombarded with sinful things from our culture and even in the church.  We need to make sure we protect them.  It makes me realize too as a mother of two little boys how careful we need to be with what we expose them to.  Boys are affected differently then girls are and sometimes as women we forget to teach our young girls and women those things about men.  I never realized it until I got married.

How to deal with the Saul Spirit

Continuation of The Controlling Spirit in the Pray Portions by Sylvia Gunter.

"Study the life of David in relation to Saul.  Look for David's prayers, attitudes, and where His confidence is, as you read these Psalms that David wrote while in difficult relationships: Psalms 3-7, 9-13, 15-18, 34, 52, 54, 56-57, 59, 63, and 142.

Ask, "Lord, what are you teaching me about myself?  What is it in me that You are determined to purge me of?  Keep me here until You have done the work, and then deliver me."  Effectual dealing with the Saul-type controlling spirit must be done on three fronts: sin, woundedness, and spiritual warfare.  You need to repent of your sins and let God heal your wounding.  Then you are in a position to deal with the spiritual warfare issues.  Your enemy is not the person, but the spiritual power behind the control.

1.  Work through forgiveness.

  Thank God for your controller's good qualities.  Ask God to forgive you of the judgment in which you have held him.  Ask Him to forgive you of bitterness, and ask God to bless them with healing.  The controller has many good qualities.  He is a victim of his own family of origin.  Try to understand where he came from and what is going on in him, so that you can extend grace to him and truly love him.

2.  Let God judge.

  God will judge the controlling spirit.  Saul, his three sons, his armor bearer, and all his army were destroyed.  (1 Sam. 31:1 and following).  The ultimate controller has suicidal tendencies.  Saul tried to kill himself but had to ask someone else to finish the job (31:4).

3.  Acknowledge to God that you have grieved over the relationship.

  You never had or do not have an affirming relationship with your controller (father or husband or boss or pastor.)  Thank God that it has caused you to press in to Him, to know Him as your Father or Husband in dimensions you never could have known Him otherwise.  God is the great Redeemer.  He will restore the years that the locusts have eaten.

4.  Persevere in prayer.

  The battle is a long war (it continued 7 1/2 years), indicating that this is one of the hardest spirits to get rid of (2 Sam 3:1).  Eventually you will win.  As the house of David grew stronger and stronger, the house of Saul grew weaker and weaker.  As you stand in prayer and begin to resist it, you will grow stronger in the Lord, and the grip of the Saul will be exposed and grow weaker.

5.  Set righteous boundaries.

  Jesus had this one limitation--He only did the will of the Father.  Ask your Father how much of the relationship you must continue to be.  You many have no choice, but remember that Jonathan died with his father.  God can give you grace to choose life instead of death.

6.  Take lessons from David's response to Saul.

  Spiritual victories are won by coming against an enemy in the opposite spirit from that which drives him.  For example, meet pride with humility, not more pride.  Meet angry words with a soft answer, not more angry words which stir up more strife.  The following are examples of how David demonstrated his understand of this principle.

  *He would not wear Saul's armor.  He would not imitate him.

  *He knew the living God intimately.

  *He did not throw spears back."

I hope you have enjoyed this little series on Saul.  It made me stop and think about how we all have the tendency to be like Saul, but should be more like David.    While we may not be exactly like Saul, we have qualities that can make us like him. 

A situation in my family this year has made me realize more deeply how easy it can be to let sin alienate us from God.  I never realize how Anger and bitterness will only make one delusional about the realities of life.  {Sin will take you further then you want to go, keep you longer then you want to stay and cost you more then you want to pay.}

Be praying for someone in my family.  They desperately need prayer.  They are living with a true blooded Saul in their life and it is hurting the whole family.  Pray it is not too late to turn them around.  I sat there the other day thinking about how I wanted to pound on "someone" for putting someone I love through this trial.  I asked God what I should do and that day or the next I read in the bible we are to restore them to righteousness through gentleness.  That was my answer.  Gentleness.  When I felt like telling them to "Man Up" and get over them selves and quit being so arrogant, God was telling me to be quiet.

The Saul Controlling Spirit

Continuation of The Controlling Spirit in the Pray Portions by Sylvia Gunter.

"What if you discover that the controller is you?

Perhaps God has given you revelation of your true self, and you do not like what you have seen.  You do not want to be that way.  The first step in breaking the cycle of the Saul syndrome is to acknowledge where you are and what is being done by you or to you in terms of control.  Getting free is as simple as submitting to un-learn everything that you did not learn at the foot of the cross.  Forgive, and be forgiven, and get set free.

God will give you grace to let Him deal with you.  If you are controlling others for your own ends, you are not serving; If you are not serving, you are not Christ-like, and you have missed the whole point of the Christian life.  God wants you to be surrendered to Jesus to let Him form His life in you and live it out through you.  Humility surrenders to God; pride controls.    Pray for God only to control you and those around you and to take away your desire to control.  As you surrender to the Holy Spirit to fill you, you will become stron in the Lord.

There is a leadership-style test that is widely used in the body of Christ that glorifies this controlling personality type with a high-sounding description.  It has ignored God’s righteous standard of servant hood.  Think about the apostle Paul.  He was a Saul, and God arrested him on the road to Damascus.  God can also turn around the Saul in you or the one closest to you.  There is hope, but only God can do it.  Let Him.

Controlling like Saul is a sin needing repentance.

Pray: Father, in Jesus' name,

I renounce the Saul controlling spirit.  I do not want it.
I repent.  Forgive me for sinning against you and others I have controlled.
I submit to the Lord Jesus Christ and resist the tendency of my flesh to control.
I surrender to a new work of the Holy Spirit.
I choose to be strong only in the Lord.
By faith I receive Your grace for humility and holiness, for making me a person after God's own heart -- a worshipper, courageous, a warrior, prudent in speech, wise and discerning, handsome with the beauty of the Lord, with Your signature upon me. (I Sam. 16:18).  In Jesus' name, Amen.

Being controlled by a Saul is a wound to be healed.

Pray: Father, in the name of Jesus,
I forgive ______ for controlling me by the spiritual stronghold of Saul.
I renounce the soulish grip that Saul spirit has had ove rme in the past by their controlling actions.  Free me from all soul ties and the curse of control.
I bless this person in Jesus' name.
Bring me into the freedom and joy of true submission to You alone.  In Jesus' name, Amen."

**There is one more portion of The Saul Controlling Spirt, How to deal with the Saul spirit.

The Saul Controlling Spirit--Check-List Continued

Continuation of The Controlling Spirit in the Pray Portions by Sylvia Gunter.

"16.    He cannot affirm others and will dishonor them publicly.

Saul dishonored his own son publicly and even tried to spear him (20:33).  Sauls throw verbal spears.  They mock others publicly.  Saul’s audacity in daring to touch the Lord’s anointed David is met by David’s unwillingness to take Saul’s life even when he easily could have, and when David’s men wanted to and would have, if David had not prevented them.  Saul was twice delivered into David’s hands, and David did not touch him (24:17, 26:17).  Saul even admits that he has dealt wickedly with David, but he is driven and under compulsion to get David out of the way.  He is jealous and by this time insane.

17.    He manipulates by gifts, favors, bribery, and guilt.

Saul is trying to keep the kingdom after God has taken His hand off him, so he resorted to flesh, soul power, manipulation, and the schemes of man (22:7-8).

18.    He is tremendously deceived and cannot perceive things correctly.

This is an important point.  The perceptions of a Saul are off.  It is like their lens needs focusing.  They are in spiritual darkness and don’t know it.  Saul accused Jonathan of stirring up David to ambush him (22:8, 13).  Who wants to ambush whom?  Yet Saul accused David of conspiracy, lying in wait, and rebellion.  This is not a logical or intellectual problem.  Saul could not be reasoned out of this.  He was deluded and got progressively worse (23:14).  Finally he could not hear God’s voice, so he resorted to a medium (28:6 and following).  Many Sauls get involved in the occult, go to psychics, or read horoscopes, because they cannot hear God for themselves.  If they are religious, they run from prophet to prophet asking them, “Do you have a word from God for me?”    The ministry of prophets is honorable, but is this not like charismatic fortune telling?  Why can’t you get a word from God for yourself?

19.    He hears only what he wants to hear.

Saul listened to people who lied, rather than those who told him the truth.  David confronted him on this (24:9), and Samuel, Jonathan, and the priest Ahimilech (all godly men) spoke the truth to him, but Saul would not listen, because eh did not want to hear it.  Saul still believed what he wanted to believe.  There is at least one henchman, in this case Abner, feeding the conspiracy (25:5), so they can keep on doing what they have their mind made up to do.

Notice that David spared his life (24:9), and Saul appeared remorseful (24:17).  But he proved that he was unrepentant when he continued to pursue David.  David again spared his life (26:9), and again Saul appeared remorseful and blessed David (26:21).  But he had no true change of heart.

20.   He is perfectionistic, demanding, and judgmental. 

He cannot receive love and therefore cannot give it.  His worth and identity are tied up in roles and performance.  He is very image conscious.  How he is perceived is more important than who he is.  He sets impossible standards.  He cannot delegate, because it won’t be done “right” (that is, his way).  He is very hard on himself, and this will incline him to depression.

There is the picture.  Now what?  Why would God put David in the household of a Saul for fourteen years?  To take the Saul out of David.  Why would he put you under a controller?  For the same reason.

Distance or avoidance are not permanent solutions to dealing with Saul.  How long should you stay around a controlling spirit?  Until God delivers you from it.  Until God takes the Saul out of you.  Until you don’t want to be that kind of person.  Until you have a passionate desire to totally surrender to God in relationships and give up all control.  Until you are humbled and free from judging or reacting to such a person.  Until you want to be a David-hearted leader.  Make no mistake—God is looking for the Saul in you.  The greatest temptation when you are being “as-Saul-ted” is to pull the spear out of the wall and throw it back.  If you do, you will be every bit as much a Saul as your Saul.

*He honored God’s anointing, even when Saul was not acting worthily.

*He spared Saul’s life because of mercy and meekness, while Saul tried to kill him.

*He let God vindicate him and deal with Saul."

My thoughts:  The one thing that jumped out to me in this last section of the check-list is how one sets impossible standards.  I find that I at times expect way to much out of my young children and I forget their age and that they too are learning.  I really have to work on that.  I expect them to know something they have never been exposed to or learned.  I also have to realize that they don't have to be a perfectionist like I was taught.  Do it right the first time mentality...  I think that is great, but when dealing with children you have to know they may not do it right the first time.

I remember working with my dad one night as he was trying to get a well installed by our garden.  He had found water there and was trying to put pipes together to run it.  He asked me to run get an elbow.  I had no clue what an elbow was.  I was probably only 8, 9, or 10.  All I knew was I needed to run and get it.  So run I did to his truck.  I threw open the door and searched frantically for anything that looked like an elbow.  Something that as bent.  I found it, breathed a sigh of relief and ran back to my dad hoping I did the right thing but not for sure.  Luckily it was the right thing.

I think about that story often and try to remember it as a lesson when teaching my own kids something.  I can't expect them just to know it and me not put any time or effort into it with them.  I have to plan on me doing nothing so I don't get distracted from teaching them and then getting annoyed if they dont' get it right.  I find if I take the time, they enjoy it much more. 

Taking time with them to teach them shows them my love.  As my son tells me, "I want to work all day and not play!"  I just smile and think, "yeah right."  I'm glad he enjoyed washing windows with me, even if it was punishment for whining and complaining about something else.....

Check-List Continued-The Saul Controlling Spirit

Continuation of The Controlling Spirit in the Pray Portions by Sylvia Gunter.

"11.  He will have outburst of rage that are deadly.

Saul is known in the Bible as the spear-thrower (18:11, 19:10).  This anger was reserved for those closest to him in his household.  This is the first of numerous times that Saul attacks David and tries to kill him.  Sauls speak words of failure and condemnation to those closest to him.  Sauls are particularly attracted to the psalmist, because the music of worship soothes their spirits, and at the same time they are afraid of the Lord in the psalmist, afraid of his or her success, and afraid of how other people love them (18:12, 15, 16).  Sauls will strongly desire to take out those whom he perceives to be a threat to his position or his kingdom.  When that did not work, Saul sent David away.  That reveals the other of the tactics of Saul: the silent treatment, cold shoulder, withdrawal, or putting up walls.

12.   He cannot be trusted.

Saul was a liar, deceiver, and manipulator.  He had no integrity and did not keep promises.  He could not be trusted.  Saul promised his oldest daughter to David, but his real intent was for the Philistines to kill him (18:17-19).  But when the time came for the marriage, Saul gave her to someone else.  Then he promised his second daughter to David to become a snare to him.  He made the dowry 100 foreskins of the Philistines, again intending to get rid of him (18:20-27).  He had his servants lie to David in sending him the message that he delighted in David and wanted him to marry his daughter (18:22).  Sauls send double messages.  They may pretend to love you, but they are really plotting to eliminate you.  Sauls do not keep promises even to their own families.  He promised Jonathan that he would not put David to death, but he again tried to pin David to a wall with a spear (19:4-10).  This illustrates the double messages.  It causes you to question your own sanity or theirs.

13.  He is paranoid.

The fear factor was so great that Saul was capable of murder.  Jonathan acknowledged this when he said, “my father is looking for you to kill you (19:2).”  Yet Saul calls David his enemy (18:29, 19:7).  Saul was the enemy of God’s anointed, but he really believed that God’s anointed was his enemy.  This leads to territorial preservation.  Saul will always conspire to neutralize or take out the one he considers to be a threat.  Every day Saul searched for David to kill him, but God did not give David into his hands (23:14).

14.  There is uproar and confusion around him.

Everyone around Saul walks on eggshells.  You cannot be sure where he stands or what kind of mood he might be in.  David hid in a field while Jonathan went home to check out Saul’s mood (20:5).  Sauls have to keep things stirred up.  They play the game of uproar.  They don’t have peace (14:52).  They are never satisfied, and there is no way to please them (16:14).

15.  He demands total loyalty, even when he is wrong.

Saul was upset and angry that his son loved David (20:30).  He demanded Jonathan’s total loyalty.  He saw it as disloyalty that Jonathan was a friend of David’s.  Sauls are very possessive and don’t want you to have other close friends.  They take any confrontation or disagreement as disloyalty.  They have the “all or not” thinking of a dysfunctional family.  They see everybody as all for me or all against me.  They react to honest differences of opinion with anger or the silent treatment.  They will not like you if you disagree with them.  As they force people to choose sides, this causes division and disunity (20:30, 22:17).  He could not let Jonathan love both him and David (29:30-31).  Although Saul demanded total loyalty, he betrayed both David and Jonathan and even God by his disobedience.  One evidence of this is found in 1 Samuel 22:18-21, as Saul kills 85 priests of the Lord, all anointed men of God.  Sauls dare to attack and destroy men of God."

My Thoughts:  I hope that anyone that reads this will realize that I am not looking for sympathy.  I am simply writing down what thoughts I have about the struggles I used to have or maybe currently face.  I have come to realize that there is freedom in admitting my faults and holding myself accountable for my sins.  Writing things down helps me think clearly but also in a way meditate on the Bible in a way that I can't do by just thinking.  My mind gets easily distracted with two youngs kids around.  So I often type these thing during naps or after the kids go to bed and post it later.  I don't want people think I am neglecting my duties.

I grew up in a home where anger outbursts were common, the silent treatment used and words were used to put down each other.  While maybe it was not as frequent as I remember, I do want to stress how much of an impact it had on my upbringing.  You can have very little outbursts or frequent ones and they will both affect your children.  I remember one time in particular that I remember my mom and dad fighting and she yelled at dad she was leaving him.  I went upstairs and hid and covered my ears scared from the yelling that was happening.  I'll never forget it.

Why do I tell you this?  Because our children are listening to us even when we forget they are there.  The way we treat each other as husband and wife will one day be the same way our children will treat others.  As a child, I never liked conflict and would never take sides when a division would occur.  I simply just wanted to be neutral or indifferent to any conflict that was occurring.  I only remember yelling at my mom one time growing up.  She should have spanked me hard for doing that but she didn't.  It wasn't until after I got married that those seeds sprouted under conflict and patterns learned or observed as a child were now being repeated in my own marriage.  It was hard for me to communicate during times of disagreement and when I did I felt like I was pulling my own arm off to admit my own fault, if I even did admit them.  I would feel like that little girl running from something I didn't understand.  I'm so glad God brought me to a good church where I have grown.  Though I am not perfect, I have changed.

I have always admired families that have taught their children well.  Taught them to cook, clean, sew, how to treat a future husband, discuss how men think and my role as a wife someday.  I feel like I have learned so much these last few years about life that I hope someday I can pass that on to my children.

Check-List Continued of The Saul Controlling Spirit

Continuation of The Controlling Spirit in the Pray Portions by Sylvia Gunter.

"6.  He is remorseful but does not truly repent.

Remorse is seen in Saul in 1 Samuel 15:30.  God took the kingdom from Saul and gave it to David because Saul disobeyed God.  He could have repented and cried out to God for mercy, and His kingdom would have been spared, but he did not.  Look at David—he committed murder and adultery, yet he deeply repented, and God called him a man after His own heart.  Saul could have recognized the anointing upon David and stepped down and let David be king.  He was determined to keep the kingdom, although God had removed His hand from him.  A Saul is always fiercely dedicated to territorial preservation.

7.  He controls by fear, intimidation, emotional manipulation, shame, put-downs, punishment, rejection, or failure.

Even Samuel, a mighty prophet of God, was scared of Saul (16:2).  David had to flee Saul, because Saul was going to kill him.  A controller hates God’s anointed.

8.  He uses people who make him look good.

David made Saul look good.  He killed Goliath and won victories.  He saved Israel from the Philistines, and Saul gave him a high position (18:5).  Saul liked David and used him as long as he made him look good and did not threaten or cross him, as long as he told him the things he wanted to hear (16:21).  A Saul is unable to love people, because he cannot trust.  So he uses people.  Saul used him, abused him, and discarded him after he was not useful.

9.  He has to be #1 in his desire for power, fame, prominence, and position.

He must win at all costs.  He only feels important giving orders.  He cannot celebrate success and exaltation of others (1 Samuel 18:7).  Saul was angry at the attention given to David.  He was galled that the women were singing that kind of song about David (18:8).  He was unholy, prideful, and intent on being #1.

10.  He is insecure, very fearful, cowardly, very jealous, and suspicious.

Saul’s inferiority and low self-esteem were revealed when he began to look at David with suspicion (18:9).  He was afraid of David because the Lord was with David but had left him (18:12).  Sauls are afraid of people who threaten them because they see the Lord in their lives.

It is important that we see our Sauls as wounded and in need of healing.  They have love-deficits, and basically they cannot give you what they don’t have.  How did they get that way?

*They share our common sin nature—there is tremendous ego, pride, and self in all of us.

*They were hurt and wounded in their family of origin.  They feel they must control their world so they won’t get hurt again.  Perceived self-preservation is very strong.

*They were trained that way—grew up in atmosphere of control, learned it at home.

*They carry a familial or familiar spirit—attaches to families and runs in bloodlines.  You don’t discuss it out.  You cast it out to break its power."

My thoughts:  I have read over this check list many times trying to see if I see myself in them.  While there are bits and pieces I see of myself and know that I need to deal with, there are some that are not part of me.  It's sad to know that someone who holds so much power over us can affect our life in such a drastic way and our view of our heavenly Father.  I have struggled for years of my own view of my heavenly Father and have struggled to know how to have that close an intimate relationship with him that I should have.  Over the last few years I have grown in knowing what my part is in developing that relationship with Him through Bible Studies, talks with other Godly women, and good Christian based books to learn how to cultivate my relationships with my own family. {I have a long way to go though!} 

What I have come to realize is that behavior is learned and allowed.  If care is not taken to cast out this controlling sin, it WILL affect and multiple rapidly within the family structure.  Seeds of this sin may not appear for a long time, but they are still there waiting for the day to sprout under the right conditions and wreck havoc on everyone in the family, especially your children.  Children just want to be loved and if they do not get it from their fathers they WILL look elsewhere to fill their need for love and admiration.  Just know it can be from places that are not a Godly influence on your children. 

20 Point Check-List-Have You Been Sauled?

The following is the continuation of The Saul Controlling Spirit of the Prayer Portions written by Sylvia Gunter.

"The characteristics or profile of a modern-day “Saul” controller can be laid out in a 20 point check-list.  If you have some of these tendencies, go before the Lord.  If you have most of them, you are a controller and that is not God’s way.  Repent and get help from a wise and seasoned brother or sister in the Lord who can help you.  If you have been “Sauled,” that also is not God’s way, and you need help for healing and release.

1.  He may be religious and may even have the word of the Lords at times.

Saul had been touched by God, but he did not have the personal intimacy with the Lord that David had.  When he was made king, he did not call for the ark nor call the nation Israel to rejoice before the Lord (I Sam 11:12-15).  There is not evidence that he was a man of prayer and worship.  He did not wait on God nor spend time alone with God.  He sought God personally only once when he was desperate (14:35).  Otherwise, he sought God only through Samuel, and eventually he could not hear God’s voice, because he had disobeyed God.  When his men were going out to battle and were scared, unlike David, he did not encourage them in who God is, because he did not know God intimately.

The Spirit came upon Saul in 1 Samuel 10, and thereafter he was touched by the Holy Spirit from time to time.  So, a person with Saul spirit can have the word of the lord at times (1Sam 19:23-24).  When they do, you think you are crazy or judgmental for seeing lying, deception, manipulation, and other sins in their lives.  They may speak powerfully in a meeting where the spirit of God is moving, but when they leave, they are back to their old selves.  When Saul got into the presence of Samuel or the prophets, and God’s spirit was moving, Saul was touched as well.  So the Spirit can move through a Saul from time to time.  But make no mistake: the Bible is very clear.  The Spirit of God departs from this leader (16:13-14).  He loses the anointing of God because the fullness of the Holy Spirit is given to those who obey God, who walk according to the Spirit and not the flesh.

2.  He will take matters into his own hands.

When his men began to scatter, Saul disobeyed Samuel’s instructions, which were God’s commands, and offered a religious reason for doing so.  “I was compelled” to offer the offerings.  Circumstances made me do it (1 Sam 13:8-13).  A Saul believes that the end justifies the means.  When confronted by Samuel, there was no sign of repentance.  Saul was not contrite and humble.  Outward use of power will eventually reveal their inner bankruptcy.

3.  He blames others for his own wrong actions.

Saul blamed his disobedience on others (1 Sam 13:8-13).  He had the audacity to blame Samuel.  God gave His opinion of Saul’s sin: you have acted foolishly, your kingdom will not endure, your sons will not be on the throne, because you did not keep the Lord’s command.  God went on to reveal the kind of man He was looking for, “a man after my own heart (13:14).”  Saul’s blaming others is really seen in 1 Samuel 15 in the matter of sparing the Amalekite king and the best sheep.

4.  He fears man more than God.

In 1 Samuel 15, the most telling picture of Saul emerges.  He clearly disobeyed in the matter of the king of Amalek and the sheep.  He was told to spare nothing (1 Sam 15:3).  Saul protested to Samuel that he had obeyed God (15:13).  When Samuel confronted him with his disobedience through the bleating sheep, Saul said, “They did it.  I obeyed, except for this one Amalekite (15:15, 20).”  The Amelekites in the Bible are a picture of the flesh.  Saul will spare what appears to benefit him of the flesh.  Saul did not recognize that partial obedience is total disobedience in God’s sight.  According to 2 Samuel 1:8 and 13, an Amalekite killed Saul.  What Saul spared of the flesh killed him.  The magnitude of his desire to please the flesh is seen in his people-pleasing, as he says to Samuel, “O.K., so I sinned, but honor me before the people (15:30).”  There was no public humbling and no repentance.

5.  He will be rebellious, stubborn, arrogant, and proud.

As Samuel confronts Saul, telling him that obedience is better than sacrifice, he says that root of the sin of rebellion is witchcraft, and the root of stubbornness is idolatry (15:22-23).  Witchcraft is control by any other means than the Spirit of God.  Anything that does not originate in the Spirit originates in the flesh.  Galations 5:20 confirms this, as it lists sorcery as a work of the flesh.  Desire to control others is a work of flesh which will always war against the Spirit.

How is stubbornness like idolatry?  Saul had to be right and his own rightness was an idol.  Image, popularity, or even religious status is an idol.  True authority is the authority of God humbly and righteously and obediently expressed in a man who is submitted to God first of all, in truth and faith to trust Him to work His purposes in all things.  Anything else is counterfeit spiritual authority.

Parenthetically, God regretted that He made Saul king, because “he has turned away from Me and has not carried out My instructions (15:11).”  Samuel genuinely grieved for Saul the rest of His days (15:35, 16:1).  You are not on praying ground for your controller until your heart is right.

The spirit of control out –of-control really begins in 1 Samuel 16.  It is an addiction to control that is characteristic of the compulsive/addictive personality.  Many leaders who had alcoholic fathers would never think of being an alcoholic, but they become a control-o-holic instead."

{Check-list to continue another day.}

Have You Been Sauled?

My mother sent this article on Saul that is very convicting.  My family has a history of having a controlling spirit that has been passed down from several generations.  This is the generation that must stop this sinful act.  I'll have to post this in several posts, but I know if you take the time to read it, you will be blessed.

This article is from the Prayer Portions by Sylvia Gunter and has been typed word for word and is in quotes.  I receive no credit for it.  It is not my own.

"The Saul Controlling Spirit

Thanks to Mary Lance Sisk of Charlotte, NC, for her excellent scriptural insight into the Saul spirit.  Blessings.

The controlling spirit personified in Saul has impacted everybody’s life.  It has violated many families personally, emotionally, spiritually, and sometimes physically.  Almost everybody has either controlled or been controlled.

Why identify and deal with the Saul spirit?

The Saul spirit in a father is the worst enemy to a person’s fully relating to our heavenly Father.  Jesus claimed intimacy with His Father, calling Him Father 156 times in the book of John, the writer with the tenderest, most loving heart.  The Jews of the day could see God as creator, or lawgiver, or righteous judge, but Jesus addressed him intimately, as Abba, Papa-God, in loving relationship.  He taught us through the model prayer to address God as “Our Father.”  In fact, Jesus died to bring us near to the Father in blood relationship.  “I am the way, the truth, and the life.  No man comes to the Father, but by me (John 14:6).”  So Fatherhood is important to God.  The first recorded words of Jesus were “Don’t you know I have to be in my Father’s house, about my Father’s business?”  In His last words from the cross, He twice addressed God as Father.  We come to God as a little child climbing up into the lap of a loving Father for help, protection, calm, loving, assurance by His presence.

The Saul spirit in a father produces a distorted picture of God.  The human family is meant to reflect heavenly reality.  When it does not, the distorted picture of God learned thereby must be unlearned years later, so that God’s Father-heart can be imparted to people who are hurting, rejected, feeling abandoned, or condemned.  Yes, God is majestic and holy and has all dominion, and He is my Daddy, Papa-God, for fellowship, immediate access, guidance, security, inheritance, life, good gifts, provision, and so much more.

The Saul spirit stands in the way of revival, because it stands between you and a deep personal relationship with God.  Controllers want to dictate even to God.  They have a hard time getting out of the way and letting God be God.

The controlling spirit is a curse that is passed down from generation to generation.  If you were raised in a household with a father or mother who is dominating, you will end up with controlling tendencies yourself.  Furthermore, you will be drawn to people who have them because that feels normal.  That is the pattern you lived in as a child.  But you do not have to live like that.  Galations 5:1 says that Jesus died to set you free.  You do not have to remain under that yoke of bondage.

Ignorance of the controlling spirit is deadly for your children.  Being ignorant of the operation of this principle of control will make you vulnerable to deadly results.  God does not want the church ignorant.  Pastors, Christian leaders, and fathers ignore at their own peril the diagnosis of this Saul spirit of control.  All Saul’s sons were tragically destroyed, except for one crippled grandson named Mephibosheth.  Think of it:  destroyed or crippled!  I have seen these Saul personalities pick off worship leaders and pastors and cripple Christian ministries.

Jesus died so that we might enjoy freedom.  Instead of cleaning up the mess, why not become enlightened and obedient to deal with Saul in a strong and righteous way?  Why station an ambulance at the bottom of the cliff?  Why not build a guard rail at the top of the cliff?

As we look at the picture of Saul as presented in 1 Samuel, stop and pray for God to open your eyes to give you deep spiritual insight, understanding, and revelation.  Ask God to reveal to you the controlling tendencies in your life, and deal with your own controlling tendencies.  When God exposes a thing, He is ready and able to heal.  He comes with the anointing for deliverance.  When you deal with the sin in your own life, you can extend grace to others and know how to pray for them.

The prophet Samuel was old, and the people wanted a king like other nations.  He warned them what the king would do to them, but they did not heed his warning.  God gave them their request, and Samuel anointed Saul king at God’s direction.  Saul was the tallest and most handsome man in Israel.  His flesh was attractive and stood out head and shoulders above others.  People accepted him and made him king before the Lord at Gilgal.  After God anointed him, God warned Saul that his kingship and his kingdom depended on obeying him.

Saul was a valiant warrior (I Sam. 14:48).  God raised up an army around him.  The best men joined him.  God put the fear of the Lord on the nation Israel to follow Saul.  God gave him victories for the people of God over the Amorites and Philistines.  God gave him everything he needed to be a leader of God’s people.  He began well and had great success, and at first we do not see much of the spirit of control operating in Saul.  It is hard to see the spirit of control in a leader in the beginning.  Most of the time, if they are chosen by God, they start off right.  It takes time to recognize this spirit in another person.  It may take months or maybe years to see the great ego, drives, and desire for power or recognition."

{20 point check-list to follow in several different posts.}

Proverbs 22:24

Proverbs 22:24,

"Make no friendship with an angry man;

and with a furious man thou shalt not go:"

Our Pastor always tells us that behavior is "learned and allowed."  Boy!  Isn't that true.  I grew up in a home where yelling was the normal communication mode when things got tough.  I learned and observed this type of behavior as a child.  It was never taught that this was wrong, but behavior that happens in a home usually becomes the stomping ground for the future generations to come until you put a stop to it.  I never really thought of myself as an angry person.  I would get "upset" and let it stew and then it would erupt later, just as my parents showed me.  It can be hard to control until you realize the pattern that proceeds your outburst.  I know that I am not the only one that struggles with this.  So why is it so hard for one to confess?  Don't we realize when we confess our faults one to anther it will heal us.  "Confess [your] faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." James 5:16.

So now you know one of my faults.  I get tired and cranky just like anyone else and will snap just like anyone else.  I put too much on my plate at times and feel like I got to get'er done.  I allow my circumstances at times dictate how I feel.  I hate being interrupted while doing what I want.  While I don't feel that I get angry often, it doesn't matter how often I do.  It is still sin and I am accountable for my actions.  I must teach my children how to deal with it and learn at the same time what the Bible says about it.

Do you struggle with this sin?  

What does the Bible say about an angry person?

Proverbs 14:29 says

"[He that is] slow to wrath [is] of great understanding:
but [he that is] hasty of spirit exalteth folly."

The Bible says if you are slow to anger {wrath} you understand where anger can lead you.  You are wise.  But one who is quick to anger is impatient or short in spirit and will display his self as foolishness.

Matthew 5:22a,

"But I say unto you,
That whosoever is angry with his brother
without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment:"

What happens to us when we get angry?

Will Suffer punishment.

Proverbs 19:19,

A man of great wrath shall suffer punishment:
for if thou deliver [him], yet thou must do it again.

Revealed as a fool.

Proverbs 12:26,

"A fool's wrath is presently known:
but a prudent [man] covereth shame."

Lacks Friends

Proverbs 22:24,

"Make no friendship with an angry man;
and with a furious man thou shalt not go:"

Affects the body badly

Proverbs 14:30,

"A sound heart [is] the life of the flesh:
but envy the rottenness of the bones."

Angry man in danger of the same judgment as the murderer.

Matthew 5:21-22,

"Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time,
Thou shalt not kill;
and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment:
But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother
without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment:
and whosoever shall say to his brother,
Raca, shall be in danger of the council:
but whosoever shall say,
Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire."

What should the angry person do?

Ephesians 4:26,

"Be ye angry, and sin not:
let not the sun go down upon your wrath:"

Immerse yourself in God's word and memorize it.
Matthew 11:29,

"Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me;
for I am meek and lowly in heart:
and ye shall find rest unto your souls."

James 1:19,
"Wherefore, my beloved brethren,
let every man be swift to hear,
slow to speak, slow to wrath:"

To what is the sin of anger likened?
Proverbs 30:33
Surely the churning of milk bringeth forth butter,
and the wringing of the nose bringeth forth blood:
so the forcing of wrath bringeth forth strife."

Proverbs 17:14
"The beginning of strife [is as] when one letteth out water:
therefore leave off contention,
before it be meddled with."
Proverbs 25:28
"He that [hath] no rule over his own spirit
[is like] a city [that is] broken down,
[and] without walls."
{vulnerable to Satan's attacks}

Proverbs 27:3
"A stone [is] heavy, and the sand weighty;
but a fool's wrath [is] heavier than them both."

Proverbs 19:12

"The king's wrath [is] as the roaring of a lion;

but his favour [is] as dew upon the grass."

{Why does a lion roar?  Controlling through fear.  The roaring of the lion when he has prey causes fear in the victim and this fear makes escaping harder for the victim and thus aids the lion in capturing his food.Read more: http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Why_does_the_lion_roar#ixzz1PB0GyINN}

Proverbs 27:4

Wrath [is] cruel, and anger [is] outrageous;

but who [is] able to stand before envy?"

A torrent is something that can  not be controlled. 

Just like you see a tsunami rushing in, it devastates everything in it's path. 

It is consumed whole.

I have to tell you I am grateful for the book, Instruction in Righteousness, by Pam Forster.  It has been helpful in studying and confessing our sins.  One thing I have realized is the depth of God's word is vast.  It teaches clearly what one must do to correct or discipline depending on what sin it is, even when one sin has various circumstances, you clearly see how to restore relationships based upon God's word.  I was amazed at some of the things I didn't realize I was doing that I shouldn't be doing.  Once the verses were all compiled together according to sin, it made it easier for me to learn from and teach my own children.