The other day I was making several baked potatoes in the microwave when my oldest son asked me why I had to poke the potato before baking it. At the time I thought nothing of it, I just responded, "so it wouldn't explode." This morning as I was preparing a sweet potato to put in the oven, I started poking the potato and thought about what my son had asked me. Since a recent blog post on anger had been on my mind, I thought about how we too are like a potato. A potato has moisture in it and when heated it creates steam. If no holes have been poked in it, there is no way for it to escape and it will explode.
How many times have you seen someone explode in anger? They let something build up inside and then when heat is applied, they explode to release the inner turmoil they are feeling. What is left is a mess. Sometimes it can be clean up, but most likely it will leave damage behind that can be unrepairable.
Proverbs 14:29, "[He that is] slow to wrath [is] of great understanding: but [he that is] hasty of spirit exalteth folly."
My youngest son now is beginning to show us when he gets upset. He gets told "no" and he puts on his pouty face and scrunches up his eyes, tilts his head back and walks away crying. He usually walks all over the place or finally plops down on his diapered bottom wallowing in his self pity. There are times I want to laugh, but I don't want to encourage him that that is the right way to handle it.
It's hard to admit, but don't we too as adults do that at times? We walk around upset at something and finally with a huff we sit on our duff, crying, waiting for someone to come along and give us pity and nurse our resentment. If we don't watch it we can stew on it too long and then one day it explodes out of us like that baked potato I was talking about.
We must move on and learn to get over it quickly like Ephesians 4:26 says, "Be ye angry and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath." Don't let little things: resentment and bitterness go on. Deal with it the day it pops up. If you just nip at the weed that has started to grow, the root will still be there getting bigger. Then one day when the right conditions are there it will show itself and be bigger then before and harder to pull out.
I know I am switching gears a little but I want to know what is the biblical way to deal with anger in children? 1) Do you let them have there tantrum and sit and watch it. Wait until the have finished and then step in to correct. 2) Or do you interrupt it trying to calm them down? I know when I interrupt one of my child's tantrums it only gets worse and he can't hear a word I say. It does me no good to discipline when he is in the middle of his tantrum.
Something to think about.
Showing posts with label Just a Thought. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Just a Thought. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Rambling
One of my favorite things I like to do is watch a little bit of 48 Hours or Dateline. Of course, I am careful what I watch, but one thing that sticks out to me is the process that leads people into sin. I began to notice that it was just one sin in those peoples life that lead to other sins, which lead to more sin.
Remember what the Bible says about when you break one of the 10 Commandments or Law, you have broken them all? I can clearly see that in some of the stories that were laid out. One sin of covetousness, lead to hate or an affair and lying and then ultimately to murder. Interesting... You just can't commit one sin, because they are usually linked to another one.....
A few weeks ago I noticed that a lot of the news shows where broadcasting stories of affairs or murders dealing with people that attended Baptist churches. It made me sad to see how much news there was out there, which tarnishes the name of the church. People then began to view you has an hypocrite if you tell them what church affiliation you are from. Sad.... But this one particular story was really sad. It all started with the associate Pastor's family and another family who were close friends. The wife of the friend was head of the young peoples drama dance team. {yes this church was Baptist church I think. Sad.} She started working closely with the associate Pastor and over time they started having an affair which then lead to her husband's murder.
This story reminded me of a radio broadcast I heard about the rise in affairs in churches and some of the warning signs of them. I don't remember who it was that spoke, but what I heard was good. Women need to be cautious about working with other men in the church. What may start out as work can lead into something neither person was looking for. One may have hit a rough patch in their marriage and pretty soon the other person is building their ego and getting their respect. Pretty soon it becomes flirtatious. Then pretty soon they spend more time together and then it because more intimate.
We see it all around us. We get lulled into a comfort zone of thinking we are immune, but we are not. We have to be constantly on guard because Satan would like nothing more then to ruin our families lives. Just look at the families on these shows that go through this. Their lives are torn apart. Their kids have not just one parent taken away but possible both, depending on the circumstances.
It makes me glad that our church does not allow women to teach the young men or men in the church. One the Bible says so, I Tim 2:12, "But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. ", but it prevents men from have their emotions played with. Our young men are all ready bombarded with sinful things from our culture and even in the church. We need to make sure we protect them. It makes me realize too as a mother of two little boys how careful we need to be with what we expose them to. Boys are affected differently then girls are and sometimes as women we forget to teach our young girls and women those things about men. I never realized it until I got married.
Remember what the Bible says about when you break one of the 10 Commandments or Law, you have broken them all? I can clearly see that in some of the stories that were laid out. One sin of covetousness, lead to hate or an affair and lying and then ultimately to murder. Interesting... You just can't commit one sin, because they are usually linked to another one.....
A few weeks ago I noticed that a lot of the news shows where broadcasting stories of affairs or murders dealing with people that attended Baptist churches. It made me sad to see how much news there was out there, which tarnishes the name of the church. People then began to view you has an hypocrite if you tell them what church affiliation you are from. Sad.... But this one particular story was really sad. It all started with the associate Pastor's family and another family who were close friends. The wife of the friend was head of the young peoples drama dance team. {yes this church was Baptist church I think. Sad.} She started working closely with the associate Pastor and over time they started having an affair which then lead to her husband's murder.
This story reminded me of a radio broadcast I heard about the rise in affairs in churches and some of the warning signs of them. I don't remember who it was that spoke, but what I heard was good. Women need to be cautious about working with other men in the church. What may start out as work can lead into something neither person was looking for. One may have hit a rough patch in their marriage and pretty soon the other person is building their ego and getting their respect. Pretty soon it becomes flirtatious. Then pretty soon they spend more time together and then it because more intimate.
We see it all around us. We get lulled into a comfort zone of thinking we are immune, but we are not. We have to be constantly on guard because Satan would like nothing more then to ruin our families lives. Just look at the families on these shows that go through this. Their lives are torn apart. Their kids have not just one parent taken away but possible both, depending on the circumstances.
It makes me glad that our church does not allow women to teach the young men or men in the church. One the Bible says so, I Tim 2:12, "But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. ", but it prevents men from have their emotions played with. Our young men are all ready bombarded with sinful things from our culture and even in the church. We need to make sure we protect them. It makes me realize too as a mother of two little boys how careful we need to be with what we expose them to. Boys are affected differently then girls are and sometimes as women we forget to teach our young girls and women those things about men. I never realized it until I got married.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Rambling of Feeling Lost
Do you ever feel a little lost when it comes to knowing for sure what it is that God wants you to do to serve him? I sometimes feel that way. I've worked with the preschool/kindergarten age for the last 4 years almost 5 years at Church for Sunday School. While I have enjoyed it mostly, there are times I critique myself and wonder why I am there. I'm certainly would not say I'm a fabulous teacher. I could never teach a class full of kids full time. Sometimes I wonder if the kids even learn anything or enjoy being there. My son is in my class and all he talks about is how good his other class is. He doesn't talk about the class I teach. Is he the only one? So it makes me wonder if I am doing something wrong or if I am even in the right place to serve.
Then I stop and remember the verse I posted on my blog. Serve with Gladness. I needed that reminder today. No matter what it is we do, we are to serve the Lord with Gladness.
Then I stop and remember the verse I posted on my blog. Serve with Gladness. I needed that reminder today. No matter what it is we do, we are to serve the Lord with Gladness.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Thoughts on Money
I really wasn't for sure what to write. I don't even know why this week I chose to write about money of all things. Maybe it is because awhile back I was asked a question from another mother about how my husband and I made it work for me to stay at home. I wasn't for sure if I should post this, but I have taken some notes down about how we made it work.
I have grown up always working. I worked for my father who owned his own construction business. My job was to stain, varnish trim work, doors, windows cabinets etc. I also did a LOT of painting walls and even roofing, which was NOT my favorite thing to do. I would have shingle debris in my skin for days afterwards. Fast forward.... when I got married my husband wanted me to work. I always thought I would. We didn't think about the future and children coming into the picture very seriously. In fact I think the counseling we got should have been a lot better before we did marry.
I had always worked in banking and even thought I would be there until my dying days, but after we adopted our first son, I realized I needed a serious change. So I changed jobs for more money. I had a great job. I loved it and loved the people I worked for. Unfortunately the turn of the real estate market dived and I lost my job. My first time ever being told that I was being let go. We were really nervous about me loosing my job, but at that time I wasn't too worried. For about 6 months before loosing my job I had a desire in me start growing to stay at home. Six months before that I had lost a baby and it had devastated me. I really believe God stepped in at that time and said, "enough is enough" and He took my job from me.
It took me a couple months of really realizing it and working in my husband's heart, but after awhile we both realize that this is where I needed to be. In my home taking care of my family.
So back to the question, "How did you make it work?"
Well this will be lengthy, but if you are serious about it maybe this can help someone else.
2. Sell newer car and get a reliable, older car. Find someone who is knowledgable about that and can help you find anything you are looking for. I used to be scared about high mileage cars, but look at it as “what kind of motor does it have and what its performance record?” Many cars will run in the 100,000s with no major engine problems. You may have minor things to replace, but if you have a car that is paid off those expenses will be minimal. Plus there are people around that can help work on cars. My husband knows how to do a few things and has helped people out before.
3. Work to eliminate debt:
credit cards, car payments, memberships to magazines or gyms etc….-
Go to the Library and check out books and movies for free.
Eliminating debt will help free up your life big time!
Consolidate your debt if you can. Pay off higher interest rate debt first and then add that payment amount to the next debt.
Sometimes credit card companies can offer a low rate for a period of time. Make sure and watch for balance transfer fees, but sometimes combining credit card debt will make it easier to pay it off. Just make sure you can pay it off before the rate goes up.
Take all credit cards out of the wallet so the temptation to purchase won’t get you. It’s too easy to buy gas or stop at the store and then before you know it, your small purchases throughout the month is bigger than anticipated. We do however take one with us when traveling in case of emergencies.
4. Refinance your house to a lower fixed rate-
Make sure your new house payment will not eat up more than 30% of your future budget. Rates are really low right now for a 30 year fixed rate and that will help you get a little more house. NEVER get an adjustable rate loan. In 5-7 years your rate could sky rocket and then you could be in a big bind with a huge payment and not be able to afford it. Fixed rates are the best.
5.Evaluate your bills.
Is this bill necessary or a want? Do you need cable? Do you need extra features on your cell phone? What costs can be cut out of your grocery bill. Can you shop at discount stores?
6. How often do you eat out? Always send your husband's lunch to work, but feel free to treat yourself once in awhile. It’s hard not feeling like you are in prison and can’t go out and do anything once in awhile! Make a special night out for the family to celebrate once a month.
7. Watch it closely on spending cash, give yourself a weekly allowance. Allot a certain dollar amount each week and take that amount out in cash each pay period. Do not keep future weekly allotments in your wallet. Sometimes people have success doing this for grocery shopping. Spend only what you have.
8. Do you have unnecessary child care expenses?
9. Supplement your income
A. Watch 1-2 kids in your home. You can earn about 100-125 per kid a week if they are there 5 days a week, {$20-$25 a day per kid}
B. Clean someone’s home or business for them
C. Making things and selling them.
10. Sometimes we had to sell something we had in order to meet a need.
One of the things I have had to remind myself over and over again that this is only a season in our life. It’s been hard at times to be “content” with cutting back, but I can honestly say we have never been happier with what we have and where we are in life. There will always be another season where I can go do the things I want. For us we just don’t want to miss out on our children’s life.
I think the most important thing is this. Be content with what you have. It is so hard to do when you see others buying things all the time for their kids, but children really do not need to have everything. It will only make them spoiled and unthankful for what they do have.
Practice Philipians 4:11, "Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, [therewith] to be content."
Hebrews 13:5, "[Let your] conversation [be] without covetousness; [and be] content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."
So even now, when I see someone who is young and starting out, I tell them this:
Make sure that you learn to live on one income. You never know when something may happen. Your spouse could lose his job, you could get pregnant and be on bed rest, or someone could die. We don't know what the future holds so be smart about how you live now. It can change in an instant. Don't get caught up in having all the latest gadgets, credit card debt, a large house payment with a large home. Be content because one day God may give you that precious baby and you may not what to leave the home to go back to work.
What will you do then if you have a mountain of debt and no way out?
I have grown up always working. I worked for my father who owned his own construction business. My job was to stain, varnish trim work, doors, windows cabinets etc. I also did a LOT of painting walls and even roofing, which was NOT my favorite thing to do. I would have shingle debris in my skin for days afterwards. Fast forward.... when I got married my husband wanted me to work. I always thought I would. We didn't think about the future and children coming into the picture very seriously. In fact I think the counseling we got should have been a lot better before we did marry.
I had always worked in banking and even thought I would be there until my dying days, but after we adopted our first son, I realized I needed a serious change. So I changed jobs for more money. I had a great job. I loved it and loved the people I worked for. Unfortunately the turn of the real estate market dived and I lost my job. My first time ever being told that I was being let go. We were really nervous about me loosing my job, but at that time I wasn't too worried. For about 6 months before loosing my job I had a desire in me start growing to stay at home. Six months before that I had lost a baby and it had devastated me. I really believe God stepped in at that time and said, "enough is enough" and He took my job from me.
It took me a couple months of really realizing it and working in my husband's heart, but after awhile we both realize that this is where I needed to be. In my home taking care of my family.
So back to the question, "How did you make it work?"
Well this will be lengthy, but if you are serious about it maybe this can help someone else.
Put into writing what your Income and expenses are on one income. This will help keep perspective in what is important to have and what debts/bills can be eliminated. You will be surprised how much child care and gas expense and eating out expenses can eat up what you make.
Areas to save in:
1. Food-including eating out
A. We cut out eating out at the beginning except on payday. We would go out and celebrate 1 time a month.
B. Ask for gift cards at Christmas time for getting meat at the locker or restaurants. Every little bit helps.
C. I shop at Aldi’s for some things. I am finding I like most of their stuff, but I don’t buy meat or produce there. Their chips are so cheap and I prefer them to some of the name brands you get at the other stores. You just have to experiment and find what things you like.
D. I also prepare a monthly menu once a month, complete with my grocery list. It helps me save time week to week trying to prepare things and keeps me out of the store more then I should and picking up unnecessary items.
E. Stock up on items that you use a lot of when they go on sale: frozen veggies, canned goods, cereals, flour and sugar etc….
F. I found a web-site recently that I need to look at more closely regarding grocery shopping and saving money at http://cheapcooking.com/articles/family-menu-planning.html
While I plan my meals, I haven’t been great at planning cheaper but filling meals.
G. Make more of your foods from scratch. This will help cut down on what you buy in boxes at the store and it can be healthier too.
H. Look at your grocery bill and see what “extras” you are buying that you can live without. {Aldi’s has great alternative snacks that will save you $}
I. Baby Food: I started making my own baby food. Your vegetables you will save a lot on. I buy fresh produce when possible, but on the green beans and peas I just do frozen when it is on sale. Buying fruit and saving is a little more challenging, but if you watch the sales on fruit usually anything around .70 cents to maybe $1/lb you will save money on. I found this web-site that tells you how to prepare the different foods. http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com I usually just use my blender and ice cube trays to make what I need for several weeks and freeze them. It’s good up to 30 days frozen.
2. Clothing:
A. I rarely buy anything full priced. I wait for Kohl’s 30% off coupon and then shop the discount racks. Or I will shop JC Penny’s when they send out a $10 coupon, I take the time to go buy something for “me” then. I sometime miss just being able to just go shopping for me, but I try to be satisfied with what I have.
B. Garage sales are great for gently used baby/toddler clothes
C. Sometimes you can find things at Goodwill, but I don’t often shop/get there.
D. Craigslist is great for finding clothes or baby items you need.
3. House expenses-
A. Adjust your thermostat in the winter and summer. You can save big time on those by adjusting them 4-6 degrees either way. Dress accordingly.
B. Budget billing is helpful. You know every month what you will be paying. I make it a game each year to see if I can save money and get a credit at the end of the year.
C. Make my own laundry soap. It can save you a lot of money in the long run. I just need to check and see if it is safe for sensitive skin. http://www.duggarfamily.com/recipes.html
4. Gas/Car Expense
A. Car pooling is great if you know someone who can
B. Gas efficient cars etc…
C. Group errands together so that you don’t have to get out all the time.
D. Find someone who knows how to work on cars who won’t charge you a lot to help out.
1. Pray about it-God has provided things for us in ways we never thought about. Sometimes it was through someone giving us a bag of gently used clothes, a gift card to eat out or clothes that came from relatives at Christmas and Birthday times.2. Sell newer car and get a reliable, older car. Find someone who is knowledgable about that and can help you find anything you are looking for. I used to be scared about high mileage cars, but look at it as “what kind of motor does it have and what its performance record?” Many cars will run in the 100,000s with no major engine problems. You may have minor things to replace, but if you have a car that is paid off those expenses will be minimal. Plus there are people around that can help work on cars. My husband knows how to do a few things and has helped people out before.
3. Work to eliminate debt:
credit cards, car payments, memberships to magazines or gyms etc….-
Go to the Library and check out books and movies for free.
Eliminating debt will help free up your life big time!
Consolidate your debt if you can. Pay off higher interest rate debt first and then add that payment amount to the next debt.
Sometimes credit card companies can offer a low rate for a period of time. Make sure and watch for balance transfer fees, but sometimes combining credit card debt will make it easier to pay it off. Just make sure you can pay it off before the rate goes up.
Take all credit cards out of the wallet so the temptation to purchase won’t get you. It’s too easy to buy gas or stop at the store and then before you know it, your small purchases throughout the month is bigger than anticipated. We do however take one with us when traveling in case of emergencies.
4. Refinance your house to a lower fixed rate-
Make sure your new house payment will not eat up more than 30% of your future budget. Rates are really low right now for a 30 year fixed rate and that will help you get a little more house. NEVER get an adjustable rate loan. In 5-7 years your rate could sky rocket and then you could be in a big bind with a huge payment and not be able to afford it. Fixed rates are the best.
5.Evaluate your bills.
Is this bill necessary or a want? Do you need cable? Do you need extra features on your cell phone? What costs can be cut out of your grocery bill. Can you shop at discount stores?
6. How often do you eat out? Always send your husband's lunch to work, but feel free to treat yourself once in awhile. It’s hard not feeling like you are in prison and can’t go out and do anything once in awhile! Make a special night out for the family to celebrate once a month.
7. Watch it closely on spending cash, give yourself a weekly allowance. Allot a certain dollar amount each week and take that amount out in cash each pay period. Do not keep future weekly allotments in your wallet. Sometimes people have success doing this for grocery shopping. Spend only what you have.
8. Do you have unnecessary child care expenses?
9. Supplement your income
A. Watch 1-2 kids in your home. You can earn about 100-125 per kid a week if they are there 5 days a week, {$20-$25 a day per kid}
B. Clean someone’s home or business for them
C. Making things and selling them.
10. Sometimes we had to sell something we had in order to meet a need.
One of the things I have had to remind myself over and over again that this is only a season in our life. It’s been hard at times to be “content” with cutting back, but I can honestly say we have never been happier with what we have and where we are in life. There will always be another season where I can go do the things I want. For us we just don’t want to miss out on our children’s life.
I think the most important thing is this. Be content with what you have. It is so hard to do when you see others buying things all the time for their kids, but children really do not need to have everything. It will only make them spoiled and unthankful for what they do have.
Practice Philipians 4:11, "Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, [therewith] to be content."
Hebrews 13:5, "[Let your] conversation [be] without covetousness; [and be] content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."
So even now, when I see someone who is young and starting out, I tell them this:
Make sure that you learn to live on one income. You never know when something may happen. Your spouse could lose his job, you could get pregnant and be on bed rest, or someone could die. We don't know what the future holds so be smart about how you live now. It can change in an instant. Don't get caught up in having all the latest gadgets, credit card debt, a large house payment with a large home. Be content because one day God may give you that precious baby and you may not what to leave the home to go back to work.
What will you do then if you have a mountain of debt and no way out?
Thursday, June 9, 2011
For Instruction In Rightousness
So after getting my husbands permission to get the book, I couldn't wait to check it out. It actually arrived a lot sooner by media mail then I expected. Usually media mail is super slow but I got it in one week! When it got here, it was like a fresh breath cool air. I was relieved and eagerly anticipated digging into the book. After looking through the book quickly, my husband and I decided to go through the book with our sons in the evening for our devotional.
At first glance, the is a lot of information. It can almost be overwhelming figuring out where to begin. So as a family we are going to sit down and cover the areas that concern us the most. As we cover them we will start implementing the better way to discipline our children, but in the mean time we will all learn together what the Bible says to do. I too struggle with a lot of these areas so I look forward to learning it with my kids.
What I like about the book is that it talks about the sin itself and gives scripture on it. It also gives ideas of discipline for each area of sin, what the Bible says the sin is likened to, stories that illustrate the consequences of that particular sin, the blessings that are the opposite trait of the sin with scripture so that you can understand what we should be doing, stories of that blessing and verses to memorize.
I really look forward to this study as a family. This is another area we need to improve upon is taking time as a family to participate in Bible Time. We do read the Bible to our kids each night, but now with our oldest going into school, we need to add another level of maturity during that Bible time for him.
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