Today is a special day for our family. It is our first son's birthday and I remind myself at how far he has come since that day we met him in that cold Russian orphanage. I wondered if his birth mom remembers him and what day today is. I also wonder if she ever thinks about him. I hope so. I would love for her to see how he has grown and changed since she gave him a chance at a new life.
Our first son was challenging. We walked straight into a little boys life where he was running at full speed. He desperately needed love and discipline, but more importantly he needed our love. We love our son so much, but we lacked the know how at times to effectively discipline him. Over the years we read books, listened to messages, tried different techniques to see what would work the best for him. Yes, even 4 years later we still struggled at times to pierce that heart of his to win his obedience. We are definitely the type of people that has to have it spelled out to us how to handle a child. Believe me, we have talked with other mentors and they had good counsel, but it wasn't until the other night that it hit us over the head what WE needed to do.
Earlier this year I had a friend from church give me some CDs of a pastor's message on "3 Steps to Successful Parenting." Believe me, I needed something simple but to the point to direct me. You can get a little lost listening to multiple people tell you what you should do. I started listening to the CD one afternoon and then stopped it because I knew I needed to sit down with my husband and really listen to what this man had to say. So the next night my husband and I sat at the dinning table and took our own notes and discussed what we should do or change so that we were both on the same page.
My goal is not to go into deep detail about the message I heard. My goal with this post is to share what stood out to me and share some of the insight I gained from God's word. The message is simple. It's something that everyone can do, even me. Sometimes we look for things that lead us around in circles, but if you struggle with disciple, maybe something here will help you.
Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
God's word is simple. When you look at the first part of Proverbs 22:6 it tells you to train UP a child. It simply means start training your child at a early age. It is so much easier. Our oldest son was 18 months old when we brought him home. We really thought that it would be no problem to train him. We were dead wrong! Even at 18 months of age, children have learned behaviors that will always be a part of them. That is why I feel that this verse means to start from the time they are a tiny baby. It is much easier to train their life from sleeping habits to eating habits and their attitudes when they are months old.
Ephesians 6:4, "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."
Do you believe that rebellion is a normal part of a child's life? Think again. Rebellion in children is caused by anger or inconsistency in 1 or both parents. That is why Ephesians 6:4 says for father's {or mother} not to provoke a child because that will lead to outward and inward defiance.
So what are the 3 basic steps to successful parenting:
A) Always win- be firm and ask yourself with each confrontation with your child "who won?}
B) Be Gentle- we must cleanse our life from all harness and anger.
C) Consistency- Do you find yourself rushing through discipline because of what you are missing out on somewhere else? Then STOP! Don't rush through discipline or skip it because you are too busy with something else. If you don't win the first battle, it does take longer to win the next one.
A) Remember Proverbs 22:6? Training is done by the parent and they must be perceived by the child to be the winner. Colossions 3:20, "Children, obey [your] parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord." Do you realize that this is the only place in the Bible that says that God is pleased when children obey their parents? We must insist our children obey each time. How will they obey God if they have not first learned to obey us as parents. Make this phrase a part of your life and quote it to your child, "Do what I say, right away with a smile on your face." {My husband and I were amazed at how effective this phrase is with our son when we quote it to him. The response we have gotten from him has been night and day.}
The sermon went on to talk about how important it is to make eye contact with your child. Get down on their level and make sure they are hearing you. It's always been a struggle with my husband and I to get our son to make eye contact with us and hold it. Most children who have been nurtured carefully from a baby will be able to achieve that but we did not. We failed. So we started practicing with our son and played it like it was a game as to who could make eye contact the longest. I would smile at him, make faces and noises so that it was fun. The most important part of this is that I have to remember to practice this while I am not disciplining him. Psalm 32:8 says, "I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye." I know I have read this verse before but it hit me hard when I heard it talked about in the context that the eyes will communicate with you. When you lock your eyes and smile, it is a type of wordless communication that reaches deep into the soul. The light of the body is the eyes. So if someone will not look you in the eyes and maintain eye contact, you need to wonder what is going on inside of them.
So what about training a younger child, say a 1 year old? Yes I have one of those too! It was recommended to gently say no, frown, shake your head and GENTLY swat at their hand. In the example they gave us, {baby getting out pots from cabinet and mother saying no.}, it took her one hour to train him. After this hour, the baby crawled away and never bothered the cabinet again. They made a good point. Do you stop everything for just 1 hour to train, or would you rather spend countless days and years trying to training the the next time and the next time and the next time they disobey you.
So what type of tool should be used according to God's word? Proverbs 22:15, "Foolishness [is] bound in the heart of a child; [but] the rod of correction shall drive it far from him." The rod was explained in this verse as a small rod. It is not a board or paddle. Neither is it used in anger but out of love.
So what about the popular views on time-out? Time out was discussed on the Cd as being harsher then a spanking. When I first heard this, I wasn't for sure about that, but the verse they used made a lot of sense. Remember Cain? Yes, the man who killed his brother. Genesis 4:12-13 says, "When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth. And Cain said unto the Lord, My punishment is greater than I can bear." Do you see here that Cain was sent away to be separated from the ones he knew. He said it was greater then he could bear. This pastor mentioned that if you do use a time out that it should be used for big offenses. Have them sit on the floor with a clock in front of them for 30 minutes. If he continues to do the same offense, double it. See what the child would prefer next... a rod or hours of sitting still watching a clock?
Have you ever been faced with a public battle? Boy we have. Yes it is embarrassing. But did you know that the reason why you loose a public battle is because you are loosing them in private?
Don't allow excuses for their behavior.
Ask your children:
1) What did you do?
2) Did you know it was wrong?
These two questions will not give your child another way out. He will have to answer for his behavior. The main goal for always winning in battles is to get and keep your children's hearts.
B) Be gentle and firm.
Think about how gentle Jesus was. He never sinned even when he had to be firm.
Did you know that the gentleness in a child is learned from the gentleness in the parent, especially the father?
If we can't win over our own anger, then think about retiring to pray before we hand out the punishment. Your child will notice that you are calling upon God and eventually as they get older they will fear your time with God more then they will the punishment knowing God is on your side.
So we all know what anger is. It's not pretty. Did you know the opposite of anger is the spirit of adoption? Wow! The thoughts that flooded through me when I heard that. I remember how excited I was when we went through the process of adopting our two boys. It is a high like no other. If you have adopted, you will know what I mean. They say that this feeling should be what you feel as you parent your children. Loving, enjoying the children who are so delicate. It is a happy and joyful spirit. SLAM! It felt like a truck hit me as I remembered myself being overwhelmed with parenting a 18 month old who would not submit to our authority. We fell into getting upset and angry with him when nothing else would work. It's hard work not getting upset with your children when they disobey, but I have learned.... I am the parent.
C) Ephesians 6:4, "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." Notice the word bring them up? It means you must keep doing it. It doesn't mean do it for a little while and stop. It is a consistent action. Moms and Dads must stand together and not be divided so that they can not undermine one or both authorities. Be consistent in everything from how they dress, music, friends, church attendance and so on. It even mentioned public school and what the kids learn there. They will hear things that are contrary to what you teach them. So it is necessary to make sure they hear the truth and understand it from the parent.
I know this is a lot of information hear. The CD I listened too was very good. My husband and I sat down and discussed the notes we each took and formed a list on where we needed to work on, what we were going to both do to be on the same page. We even discussed that if we ever were harsh again with our children we would have to write a letter apologizing to our son and read it that night in front of the other family members to keep ourselves accountable to each other.
I know many have different feelings on disciple. We have as a family taken steps to outline what it is we are going to do and stick to it. I believe a print out of our "homework" list will make its way taped to a door as a reminder....
Monday, September 26, 2011
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Casting Lots
I was listening to a radio station last night when I heard a discussion come about whether gambling was a sin or not. The host then started discussing how the disciples cast lots and said that there was no difference. It boiled down to whether or not how the "christian" was able to handle gambling if it was a sin or not.
I wish I could have spoken to that person on the radio. He is leading a lot of baby Christians astray. It made me want to tell him that they need to know their Bible a little better before answering such a thing. Didn't they know what casting lots was? Did I know? What IS the difference between gambling and casting lots?
Good, I'm glad you are curious too!
So I begin my journey in finding out the basic differences are in gambling vs casting lots.
Let's first define the words:
Casting Lots: pebbles, straws, dice etc that were used in decision making. They used this method to chance to make a fair decision so that no one could say there was favoritism involved. Think of it this way, we toss a coin and say, "heads or tails" to determine who wins. It is done this way to show impartiality. Nothing is given up to to win a physical possession.
Gambling: is the wagering of money or something of monetary value for a chance to win something in turn. Do you see the difference here? To gamble you have to give up something to have a chance to maybe win something in return. To me gambling and casting lots are not the same.
So as the question was asked on this radio show.... is gambling a sin? While the word Gamble or gambling is not in the Bible, I do believe it tells us it is wrong.
So how do you start looking? Since it deals with money, let's see what God says about money.
Ecclesiates 5:10, "He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver; nor he that loveth abundance with increase: this [is] also vanity."
God's word said we will not be satisfied with the increase. We will always want more.
Matthew 6:24 and Luke 16:13, "No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon."
If making more money is what drives you, it says here you can't serve God and money.
I Timothy 6:10, "For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows."
Gambling affects many homes. Hard earned cash is used in hopes of getting more and sometimes lives are devastated because of that. Can you honestly tell me that when you go gambling that you don't have a tiny bit of excitement within you that you "hope" to win more money? It's only natural that you would think you would be the lucky one to win! Once you win, there is a drive within you that wants you to win more. This is greed.
God talks about coveting too. So what is coveting? Coveting is a longing or a desire for something. So when a person gambles, isn't he desiring more money? While Exodus 20:17 says "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that [is] thy neighbour's.", it is essentially telling us that we should not desire to have something that is not ours.
So how should we handle our money?
Read Matthew 25:14-30,
"For [the kingdom of heaven is] as a man travelling into a far country, [who] called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods. And unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one; to every man according to his several ability; and straightway took his journey. Then he that had received the five talents went and traded with the same, and made [them] other five talents. And likewise he that [had received] two, he also gained other two. But he that had received one went and digged in the earth, and hid his lord's money. After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them. And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents, saying, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me five talents: behold, I have gained beside them five talents more. His lord said unto him, Well done, [thou] good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord. He also that had received two talents came and said, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me two talents: behold, I have gained two other talents beside them. His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord. Then he which had received the one talent came and said, Lord, I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strawed: And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, [there] thou hast [that is] thine. His lord answered and said unto him, [Thou] wicked and slothful servant, thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not, and gather where I have not strawed: Thou oughtest therefore to have put my money to the exchangers, and [then] at my coming I should have received mine own with usury. Take therefore the talent from him, and give [it] unto him which hath ten talents. For unto every one that hath shall be given, and he shall have abundance: but from him that hath not shall be taken away even that which he hath. And cast ye the unprofitable servant into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."
As one can see, the Lord gives us our "money/talents". He expects us to increase it for his glory or his purpose, not for our own gain. One day he will ask us how we used it and will you say, you gambled it all away instead of furthering his kingdom?
I wish I could have spoken to that person on the radio. He is leading a lot of baby Christians astray. It made me want to tell him that they need to know their Bible a little better before answering such a thing. Didn't they know what casting lots was? Did I know? What IS the difference between gambling and casting lots?
Good, I'm glad you are curious too!
So I begin my journey in finding out the basic differences are in gambling vs casting lots.
Let's first define the words:
Casting Lots: pebbles, straws, dice etc that were used in decision making. They used this method to chance to make a fair decision so that no one could say there was favoritism involved. Think of it this way, we toss a coin and say, "heads or tails" to determine who wins. It is done this way to show impartiality. Nothing is given up to to win a physical possession.
Gambling: is the wagering of money or something of monetary value for a chance to win something in turn. Do you see the difference here? To gamble you have to give up something to have a chance to maybe win something in return. To me gambling and casting lots are not the same.
So as the question was asked on this radio show.... is gambling a sin? While the word Gamble or gambling is not in the Bible, I do believe it tells us it is wrong.
So how do you start looking? Since it deals with money, let's see what God says about money.
Ecclesiates 5:10, "He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver; nor he that loveth abundance with increase: this [is] also vanity."
God's word said we will not be satisfied with the increase. We will always want more.
Matthew 6:24 and Luke 16:13, "No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon."
If making more money is what drives you, it says here you can't serve God and money.
I Timothy 6:10, "For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows."
Gambling affects many homes. Hard earned cash is used in hopes of getting more and sometimes lives are devastated because of that. Can you honestly tell me that when you go gambling that you don't have a tiny bit of excitement within you that you "hope" to win more money? It's only natural that you would think you would be the lucky one to win! Once you win, there is a drive within you that wants you to win more. This is greed.
God talks about coveting too. So what is coveting? Coveting is a longing or a desire for something. So when a person gambles, isn't he desiring more money? While Exodus 20:17 says "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that [is] thy neighbour's.", it is essentially telling us that we should not desire to have something that is not ours.
So how should we handle our money?
Read Matthew 25:14-30,
"For [the kingdom of heaven is] as a man travelling into a far country, [who] called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods. And unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one; to every man according to his several ability; and straightway took his journey. Then he that had received the five talents went and traded with the same, and made [them] other five talents. And likewise he that [had received] two, he also gained other two. But he that had received one went and digged in the earth, and hid his lord's money. After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them. And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents, saying, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me five talents: behold, I have gained beside them five talents more. His lord said unto him, Well done, [thou] good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord. He also that had received two talents came and said, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me two talents: behold, I have gained two other talents beside them. His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord. Then he which had received the one talent came and said, Lord, I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strawed: And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, [there] thou hast [that is] thine. His lord answered and said unto him, [Thou] wicked and slothful servant, thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not, and gather where I have not strawed: Thou oughtest therefore to have put my money to the exchangers, and [then] at my coming I should have received mine own with usury. Take therefore the talent from him, and give [it] unto him which hath ten talents. For unto every one that hath shall be given, and he shall have abundance: but from him that hath not shall be taken away even that which he hath. And cast ye the unprofitable servant into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."
As one can see, the Lord gives us our "money/talents". He expects us to increase it for his glory or his purpose, not for our own gain. One day he will ask us how we used it and will you say, you gambled it all away instead of furthering his kingdom?
Monday, September 12, 2011
Prayers Unanswered
I've been working on trying to read through the Bible. Yes it has been a slow process because I do not have a set way of doing it and when. I'm doing in such an unconventional way that allows me to read where I left off when I have the time. I finished the New Testament finally and now I am in the Old Testament. Except I am starting with the last book first and trying to work my way backwards book by book.
Today I am reading in Zechariah 7 and I had to stop. Verses 8-14 hit me hard. We often wonder why our spiritual life can be in shambles and wonder why our country is in the state it is in. Read the follow verses, God has the answer and it clearly shows me why our prayers go unanswered and why are lives are not glorifying God.
Zechariah 7:8-13 (KJV), "And the word of the LORD came unto Zechariah, saying, Thus speaketh the LORD of hosts, saying, Execute true judgment, and shew mercy and compassions every man to his brother: And oppress not the widow, nor the fatherless, the stranger, nor the poor; and let none of you imagine evil against his brother in your heart. But they refused to hearken, and pulled away the shoulder, and stopped their ears, that they should not hear. Yea, they made their hearts [as] an adamant stone, lest they should hear the law, and the words which the LORD of hosts hath sent in his spirit by the former prophets: therefore came a great wrath from the LORD of hosts. Therefore it is come to pass, [that] as he cried, and they would not hear; so they cried, and I would not hear, saith the LORD of hosts: But I scattered them with a whirlwind among all the nations whom they knew not. Thus the land was desolate after them, that no man passed through nor returned: for they laid the pleasant land desolate."
Do you see this happening in our country? Is it happening in my life? Forgive me Lord not keeping my thoughts totally pure for not listening at times and refusing to follow your commands. I have at times done all this. Keep my heart tender so that I won't forget to serve others, to listen, and to stay close to you.
The God's word says that if we follow this pattern of oppression or thinking evil of others he will scatter us and we will be desolate. God will not hear us when we call out to him. Can we afford that?
Today I am reading in Zechariah 7 and I had to stop. Verses 8-14 hit me hard. We often wonder why our spiritual life can be in shambles and wonder why our country is in the state it is in. Read the follow verses, God has the answer and it clearly shows me why our prayers go unanswered and why are lives are not glorifying God.
Zechariah 7:8-13 (KJV), "And the word of the LORD came unto Zechariah, saying, Thus speaketh the LORD of hosts, saying, Execute true judgment, and shew mercy and compassions every man to his brother: And oppress not the widow, nor the fatherless, the stranger, nor the poor; and let none of you imagine evil against his brother in your heart. But they refused to hearken, and pulled away the shoulder, and stopped their ears, that they should not hear. Yea, they made their hearts [as] an adamant stone, lest they should hear the law, and the words which the LORD of hosts hath sent in his spirit by the former prophets: therefore came a great wrath from the LORD of hosts. Therefore it is come to pass, [that] as he cried, and they would not hear; so they cried, and I would not hear, saith the LORD of hosts: But I scattered them with a whirlwind among all the nations whom they knew not. Thus the land was desolate after them, that no man passed through nor returned: for they laid the pleasant land desolate."
Do you see this happening in our country? Is it happening in my life? Forgive me Lord not keeping my thoughts totally pure for not listening at times and refusing to follow your commands. I have at times done all this. Keep my heart tender so that I won't forget to serve others, to listen, and to stay close to you.
The God's word says that if we follow this pattern of oppression or thinking evil of others he will scatter us and we will be desolate. God will not hear us when we call out to him. Can we afford that?
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Don't Give Up
Over the last 4 years we have had times of joy and times of feeling like we were drowning. All of this was was God's way of growing us. As I look back now on the last +4 years we have had our son, I see a maturity in his life taking place. It's been a slow gradual process but I see it growing and it is up to us to keep teaching him.
This summer he took swimming lessons and what started out as fear later turned into confidence he needed to know that he can do it. When he started school he drew the above picture of him swimming. The smile on the boy shows how proud and confident he is becoming. I look at him and I know that he is happy. He has a love for life I haven't seen in someone for a long time. He is passionate for life and I hope he keeps that.
So just when I start to realize how he is growing, I find out how much he is really growing. His teacher from the church summer program approached us last night and told us he was 1 of 7 that has the opportunity to go on a train ride coming up soon. They get lunch and will also be able to watch someone make fudge. She went on to tell me that there were 24 kids in the program this summer and he placed 2nd. {What? 2nd?} I think my mouth dropped wide open in surprise. He placed 2nd! I couldn't believe it. I knew we had worked on his verses with him, but I can't take all the credit. He has a memory like you would not believe. He picks out details on things and remembers them. I was so proud of him working so hard. I'm excited that he gets the opportunity to go on a train ride and on his birthday weekend!
This summer God has been working on him about salvation. He wants to get saved, but he doesn't quite understand it all fully. He can tell you exactly everything he needs to know, but his heart hasn't quite connected with that knowledge he is a sinner. It's been exciting to see my son grow up. Pretty soon I believe God will call him to repentance, but until then, I am waiting and watching him become a young man.
So just when you think your children won't get it, wait a little bit.... they are... sometimes we just need to be a little more patient with them and let God take the lead. And of course, love on them. Children need to know by touch and by verbal affirmation that you love them. Just when I feel like I am not making headway, God shows me that we are.
By the way, do you know he wants to be a missionary back to Russia? Well this and the other things he wants to be. I'm just praying God will lead him there to make a difference in his birth country, Russia.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Pricking the Skin
The other day I was making several baked potatoes in the microwave when my oldest son asked me why I had to poke the potato before baking it. At the time I thought nothing of it, I just responded, "so it wouldn't explode." This morning as I was preparing a sweet potato to put in the oven, I started poking the potato and thought about what my son had asked me. Since a recent blog post on anger had been on my mind, I thought about how we too are like a potato. A potato has moisture in it and when heated it creates steam. If no holes have been poked in it, there is no way for it to escape and it will explode.
How many times have you seen someone explode in anger? They let something build up inside and then when heat is applied, they explode to release the inner turmoil they are feeling. What is left is a mess. Sometimes it can be clean up, but most likely it will leave damage behind that can be unrepairable.
Proverbs 14:29, "[He that is] slow to wrath [is] of great understanding: but [he that is] hasty of spirit exalteth folly."
My youngest son now is beginning to show us when he gets upset. He gets told "no" and he puts on his pouty face and scrunches up his eyes, tilts his head back and walks away crying. He usually walks all over the place or finally plops down on his diapered bottom wallowing in his self pity. There are times I want to laugh, but I don't want to encourage him that that is the right way to handle it.
It's hard to admit, but don't we too as adults do that at times? We walk around upset at something and finally with a huff we sit on our duff, crying, waiting for someone to come along and give us pity and nurse our resentment. If we don't watch it we can stew on it too long and then one day it explodes out of us like that baked potato I was talking about.
We must move on and learn to get over it quickly like Ephesians 4:26 says, "Be ye angry and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath." Don't let little things: resentment and bitterness go on. Deal with it the day it pops up. If you just nip at the weed that has started to grow, the root will still be there getting bigger. Then one day when the right conditions are there it will show itself and be bigger then before and harder to pull out.
I know I am switching gears a little but I want to know what is the biblical way to deal with anger in children? 1) Do you let them have there tantrum and sit and watch it. Wait until the have finished and then step in to correct. 2) Or do you interrupt it trying to calm them down? I know when I interrupt one of my child's tantrums it only gets worse and he can't hear a word I say. It does me no good to discipline when he is in the middle of his tantrum.
Something to think about.
How many times have you seen someone explode in anger? They let something build up inside and then when heat is applied, they explode to release the inner turmoil they are feeling. What is left is a mess. Sometimes it can be clean up, but most likely it will leave damage behind that can be unrepairable.
Proverbs 14:29, "[He that is] slow to wrath [is] of great understanding: but [he that is] hasty of spirit exalteth folly."
My youngest son now is beginning to show us when he gets upset. He gets told "no" and he puts on his pouty face and scrunches up his eyes, tilts his head back and walks away crying. He usually walks all over the place or finally plops down on his diapered bottom wallowing in his self pity. There are times I want to laugh, but I don't want to encourage him that that is the right way to handle it.
It's hard to admit, but don't we too as adults do that at times? We walk around upset at something and finally with a huff we sit on our duff, crying, waiting for someone to come along and give us pity and nurse our resentment. If we don't watch it we can stew on it too long and then one day it explodes out of us like that baked potato I was talking about.
We must move on and learn to get over it quickly like Ephesians 4:26 says, "Be ye angry and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath." Don't let little things: resentment and bitterness go on. Deal with it the day it pops up. If you just nip at the weed that has started to grow, the root will still be there getting bigger. Then one day when the right conditions are there it will show itself and be bigger then before and harder to pull out.
I know I am switching gears a little but I want to know what is the biblical way to deal with anger in children? 1) Do you let them have there tantrum and sit and watch it. Wait until the have finished and then step in to correct. 2) Or do you interrupt it trying to calm them down? I know when I interrupt one of my child's tantrums it only gets worse and he can't hear a word I say. It does me no good to discipline when he is in the middle of his tantrum.
Something to think about.
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